Navigating Postpartum - Amy's Journey
Hey mama, so you’ve gone through the magical door to motherhood and birthed your baby! Can we just say Congratulations! We think that every time a baby is born, so too is a mother! And while we spend so much time preparing for baby, as new mamas we often forget to prepare ourselves for the transition to motherhood.
We want to know (and share) what really goes on postpartum, so we asked mamas to share their experiences, ideas and words of wisdom about how they are navigating their postpartum journey. At Viva La Vulva we want to normalise what our bodies go through after growing and birthing a baby, and becoming a mother. Postpartum experiences are rarely talked about, but a baby changes you, your body and your soul!
If you love the idea of normalising everything postpartum and wanna share your thoughts, feelings, ideas, wisdom with other mamas to be - you can share your story here.
Thank you for this important conversation and helping us normalise these stories by telling yours, powerful mama.
AMY’S NAVIGATING POSTPARTUM JOURNEY
"It has been 5 months since my little boy leapt into the world - I was having blood pressure issues and went into hospital for blood pressure monitoring on the Monday at 37 weeks and was told I had to be admitted with preeclampsia and that I would be induced on the Wednesday. Jacob didn't like the idea of that so he started the process for himself on Tuesday evening and he burst into the world via emergency c-section (with me under general anaesthetic) on Wednesday morning. There was meconium in the waters and his heart rate dropped so out he came, covered in poop but luckily didn't ingest any. Smart kid.
The first few days of Jacob's life were both amazing and heart breaking. I wanted to be a mum since I can remember so I was so upset that I felt like I hadn't bonded with him. I felt like because I hadn't seen him be removed from my body, he could be anyone's baby. I was always relaxed about my birth plan but I never thought that was an aspect of the birth that I wouldn't get to have. I wasn't the first person to meet my son. I probably was the 15th, and that included 3 family members who saw him getting wheeled down to me in recovery.
The days ahead would be overwhelming and lovely - lovely to see his little face and toes and hands but the emotions were out of control. I had been warned about the hormones but I felt like a wild woman. Just crying at the drop of a hat and even yelled at a poor midwife for trying to help with my pain relief by spitting back out the morphine tablet because I didn't want to be "drugged out" for my baby. I was focused so hard on trying to be there for my son and bond and do everything right, I was over doing it and was in more pain than I was admitting but my priority was making a connection with my baby boy. I couldn't focus on anything else.
My milk came in but it's like my body shut down and it wouldn't come out - they tried to milk me, I tried to milk myself, I tried my best to express with a limp and after a couple days, I made the decision to exclusively bottle feed with formula. There is so much pressure out there to breastfeed and I wish I could have but I had to read the signs and signals my body and mind were sending me and it was the best choice I made for my mental health which ultimately is the best for Jacob - let's hope if I'm lucky to have another baby, I can experience breast feeding under different circumstances.
5 months on, my beautiful baby boy has gone from being a little squirmy newborn to a wiggly active smiley boy with his feet constantly in his mouth. We are bonded, connected and we love each other so much. Besties for life!
I have good days and bad days being a mum - this gig is tough at times and every day can be so different. I am realising it's ok to just be overwhelmed sometimes or get annoyed when I get thrown up for the 10th time that morning. Recently, out of nowhere, I had an anxiety attack at a bub class after Jacob threw up on the floor and on his last clean outfit - without skipping a beat, everyone rallied around to help me out with Jacob while I took a much needed 15 minute breather and chat. My anxiety issues have always been more behind closed doors so this was exposing and embarrassing but the support then and since has been amazing from these girls!
Having amazing family, friends and a super sweet antenatal group has been a lifesaver - I find the thing that keeps me going throughout the day to day mum stuff is the support from other superstar mums. Everyone's situations are so different and you can learn so much from each other.
My c-section wound was a little stubborn and unfortunately got infected a few days after leaving hospital, but has since healed up nicely, bar a few numb spots. When I was able to, I loved getting into a bath and just laying there with the wound washing in the water. I was always a bit nervous touching my wound as I always imagined somehow opening it up accidentally (a little dramatic ) so my baths were the go too. Letting my wound get nice and clean while relaxing my body. It's no picnic having major abdominal surgery and looking after a newborn but I'll always be so thankful that Jacob was able to come out safe and sound with help from the team at Wellington Hospital.
It was amazing having Viva la vulva products on hand for whatever journey I was going to go through. I loved popping these in my hospital bag and knowing they would be on hand - I have ended up using the products for a lot of random stuff postpartum. Boob balm for itchy nipples before and after birth but also use it for lip balm, dry patches on my face and dry hands or even on Jacobs dribble rash. The witch hazel is amazing for my facial eczema and has become part of a nightly ritual to help heal some sore spots and just a nice addition to my gentle skincare.
To all new and expecting mums - you got this girls! It's a wild ride but no regrets! Tips - gets your nails done before going to hospital. I had to stare at unpainted toes for a week and it sucked. Take advice but follow your own intuition - people can be so sure of one way of doing things and the Facebook support groups can be a little toxic but you will know what works for you and your family and find a few people you can be open with. Get yourself a sweet nappy bag - great opportunity for some mum shopping and it will probably end up being the only bag you carry around for a while. Routines are what we want but rarely what we get - enjoy the cuddles with your bub and take stuff as it comes. Most importantly, support other mums/parents as you would want to be supported - we need help and non judgemental support.
We loved reading this Amy. Thanks so much for sharing your experience with us!
xx VLV
Navigating Postpartum is a series by you, our sisters. If you love the idea of normalising everything postpartum and wanna share your thoughts, feelings, ideas, wisdom with other mamas to be, we wanna hear from you - please get in touch with us here.
