Lexi's Postpartum Unfiltered
Welcome mama to Postpartum Unfiltered, a series by you! We turned to our village of mamas to share their real unfiltered postpartum experiences — the highs, the lows, and everything in between. Together, let’s normalise what our bodies go through after birth and create a community of empowered and educated mamas. If you want to help normalise postpartum and share your story click here x
This is Lexi's story, founder of www.nooknz.com
Breastfeeding was supposed to be easy. Everyone says it just happens, right? I pictured myself as one of those calm, content mums, feeding away while binge-watching trashy TV and snacking on lactation cookies. But that wasn’t my reality. Instead, I found myself resenting everything around me - the noise, the chaos, the dog, even my toddler.
My first baby was born right in the middle of Covid in Hong Kong. I was on my own for an 18-hour labour, breathing gas and air through a surgical mask, and my partner wasn’t allowed in until she was actually on her way out. Then they took her off to special care and I didn’t see her for 12 hours. I was stuck in a public ward waiting to be able to feed her. It was tough. Hello... birth trauma.
When we finally got home, I was really excited to breastfeed. But the dog hated the baby. Every time she cried, she would bark like crazy. Instead of settling in and enjoying those first snuggles, I found myself escaping the house just to get some peace. It was exhausting and stressful, and formula quickly felt like the easier option. Honestly, it just gave me a break.
By the time my second baby arrived, I had a toddler who needed me just as much as the newborn. I did what I could. I fed when I could and topped up when I had to. I stopped beating myself up about it. The truth is, breastfeeding isn’t just about baby, latch, and supply. It’s about everything going on around you. Sometimes that everything is loud, overwhelming, and you just have to survive.
Those early days were far from the sweet, calm moments I imagined. I remember sitting on the floor, crying while the baby cried, feeling completely stretched thin. I looked at other mums who seemed to have it all together (they made breastfeeding seem so effortless) and wondered what was wrong with me.
But there was nothing wrong with me. I was just a mum doing her best in a messy, chaotic chapter. My babies are thriving, not because I pushed myself to breaking point but because I loved them enough to let go of the pressure.
If you are reading this, know this. You are not failing. Not because you’re tired. Not because you use formula. Not because you ask for help. You are doing an amazing job, even if your version of motherhood looks less like a storybook and more like a 6am drive-through run for a hash brown.
Thanks so much for creating this space for mums to share the truth behind postpartum life. - Lexi Founder of www.nooknz.com
🔥💗 Thank you so much, Lexi - for your honesty, and vulnerability and for sharing a piece of your postpartum journey with us. This is such a powerful step towards changing the narrative around our postpartum experiences. It's time to not only celebrate the victories but also empathise with the challenges!
If you want to help normalise postpartum and share your story click here
If you want to explore our free postpartum resources click here x
