Navigating Postpartum - Alix's Journey

Hey mama, so you’ve gone through the magical door to motherhood and birthed your baby! Can we just say Congratulations! We think that every time a baby is born, so too is a mother! And while we spend so much time preparing for baby, as new mamas we often forget to prepare ourselves for the transition to motherhood. 

We want to know (and share) what really goes on postpartum, so we asked mamas to share their experiences, ideas and words of wisdom about how they are navigating their postpartum journey. At Viva La Vulva we want to normalise what our bodies go through after growing and birthing a baby, and becoming a mother. Postpartum experiences are rarely talked about, but a baby changes you, your body and your soul! 

If you love the idea of normalising everything postpartum and wanna share your thoughts, feelings, ideas, wisdom with other mamas to be - you can share your story here. 

And Alix, thank you for this important conversation and helping us normalise these stories by telling yours, powerful mama. 

VLV: Tell us about your postpartum healing journey - how has it been for you?

Alix: Healing took really long and was worrying for me. A lot of postpartum bleeding, I was uncomfortable, my episiotomy stitches got infected, and my stitches came open. It was a lot. So I didn’t properly heal for 4 months. The peri wash bottle was most useful for me, it was so so helpful on the toilet! I loved using the breast ice packs, they were super useful, and Viva La Vulva Perineal Spray was amazing to heal my episiotomy wound. At my 6 week postpartum check up I was made to think I was meant to be totally healed by then. And when I wasn’t anywhere near healed by this point it was a very hard and unrealistic expectation that I was faced with.

VLV: What are the hardest things to expect becoming a new mum and how did you overcome/work through these things?

Alix: Not knowing what the fuck you’re doing! And you can try to be as prepared as possible, but your baby dictates everything so you have to learn to follow the baby’s lead and learn to adapt. And I found the million different ways to do things hard and all the advice you’re given - trying to navigate through this was tough. I worked out I would take out the info I wanted based on intuition and leave what didn’t feel right. 

VLV: Having a baby can change your relationships. Your relationship with yourself, your partner, your family, and your friends. What advice can you give around maintaining good relationships, during this time and beyond?

Alix: Three things that helped me the most with my relationships:

1. Communication I swear is the key to good relationships especially with a partner.

2. Understanding that some friends are in different stages of life so they don’t necessarily know what you’re going through but that’s ok. 

3. Understanding that family always mean well. 

VLV: Becoming a mother is a huge physical and emotional shift, in moments of overwhelm how do you find your calm, and look after your own mental health?

Alix: I don’t really know? I just need John (my partner) to be there for me and I’m calm… I don’t find I really need time to myself. I need John and Lola around and that’s my calm. Maybe because I am an only child, being around my loved ones is looking after my mental health. 

VLV: Do you feel different mentally, physically, emotionally, or spiritually? Has any of this changed compared to pre-baby?

Alix: I feel incredible having grown a baby and birthed her! My body is amazing! But I don’t feel like I’ve changed really, I just think my priorities have changed! And I think I knew that would be the case before I was pregnant and during pregnancy. 

VLV: What advice would you give to a first-time mama approaching her due date to help her feel more confident about her postpartum journey?

Alix:

1. Communication with your partner is sooooo important! Can’t stress this one enough. 

2. Don’t focus on a date that you’re meant to have healed by, give your body all the time in the world and don’t worry if it’s taking longer than what’s deemed normal. 

3. Unsolicited advice is at an all time high during pregnancy and birth and 4th tri (and beyond) so just take you want and leave what you don’t want… at the end of the day it’s your decision <3

We loved reading this. Thanks so much Alix for sharing your experience with us!

xx VLV

Navigating Postpartum is a series by you, our sisters. If you love the idea of normalising everything postpartum and wanna share your thoughts, feelings, ideas, wisdom with other mamas to be, we wanna hear from you - please get in touch with us here.